Author: Thewhynottraveller

Now this is well overdue but I haven’t had a moment to catch up. I’m now sitting comfortably watching the TV in my new flat. It’s been an epic journey for the last 4 months and I’d like to finish with rounding up the last few weeks.

When I left Steph I moved on to Koh Tao where I had booked five days on the island, three of which I would use to gain my open water dive qualification. It went without a hiccup and was an amazing experience. I don’t think it’s something that I’d need to chase and do all the time but it’s otherworldly and you’ll see how amazing it is to breathe underwater. I took most enjoyment in feeling like Homer Simpson in the episode when he’s weightless in space eating crisps!

Next was a meeting up that I’d been looking forward to for some time. The family where heading out and we were all meeting on Koh Samui. Unfortunately Gary, Rachel and the kids could not make it due to Max’s inability to sit still, I think we could have overcome it with a drop of brandy in his milk but they didn’t go for it.

It was beautiful to have my family in Asia with me, we haven’t had opportunities like this ever before and to be able to share some moments like my mums birthday in a location like Thailand was incredible. I don’t like to speak for everyone but I’m sure they won’t mind me saying that we all had a wonderful time. I have some great memories like the ridiculous apartment, mum zip lining, the karp monsters food and watching Benidorm Belchy drag a sun bed half way across a beach to ensure he could get maximum tanning time in his beloved I ❤️ Dorks hat and I’m sure my mum will tell you in person about bum guns and I’ll always cherish seeing my Dads face when a very suspect Ladyboy served us in the supermarket, the screwed up double take was a picture!

Before Joe and I split from the group we were lucky enough to have a few days on Koh Tao with the parents, which was class and then we headed off across the country to Koh Phi Phi. We managed to sneak on the ferry and get a free ride that day, No better price than free!

Once on Phi Phi we really didn’t get up to much except chill out and go diving together. It’s a holiday location so was quite busy at night but we both were enjoying being fresh. The diving was also epic, seeing a shark, no matter how small, swim past you underwater is literally breathtaking.

I hope that this doesn’t feel to rushed but being back into the mixer now doesn’t allow plenty of time to write posts. I’ve had the most memorable time and I’m glad I’ve been able to share my experience with anyone who’s taken the time to read them. The main shout out to my favourite fans being my Mum, Nan and Aunty! At times I’ve enjoyed writing it but others I’ve found it a little tedious, I don’t believe I was made to write blogs or writing in general as it’s something that doesn’t come easy and also doesn’t excite me but I’m happy that I have it a go and I imagine I’ll probably try again when I next go away as I have it for life and it will be something great to look back on in the future.

Love to everyone I’ve encountered along this journey and I hope to see you all soon.

#WhyNot

x

Koh Tao Diving

Koh Samui

Koh Samui Mum’s Birthday

Koh Tao with Ma, Pa and Joe Boy

Koh Phi Phi

This is the last stop with Stephanie. It ended at Siem Reap, she’d be heading home and I would be off to Thailand to learn to dive.

I had a surprise planned when we arrived and after the waiting around and pretending we would get a tuk tuk our hotel driver showed up. He couldn’t have been more apologetic for being a little late.

We hadn’t really been roughing it but I couldn’t resist one five star hotel on this trip, the standard for the price is outrageous.

The hotel was beautiful, the highlight being the bath, I think I’ve seen smaller swimming pools! Steph, grinning like a Cheshire Cat, showed how pleased she was with it all, even though most of it was for my own self indulgence it was great to see how happy she was with it.

The plan was room service by night and then pool by day, it was a stunning place to relax. It’s all been so stressful…

Siem Reap is a great place with plenty to see and do, It’s really easy to spend time knocking about, having a massage and seeing so many market stalls. We didn’t really take part in Pub Street but we did take a stroll down there one evening, I must be getting old because that was enough for me. The following evening we headed to the Phare Cambodian Circus, it was very reasonably priced for how entertaining it was. From simple plate spinning to double backflips 30ft in the air it had so much going on, everyone should definitely check it out if you get the chance, it’s a perfect evening filled. I even got to go home with a clown!

Now, if you know a little bit about Siem Reap you’ll know that it’s where you head to see Angkor Wat. The temple was built by the Khmer Empire in the first half of the 12th Century and for its size was built in record time. It is the largest religious monument in the world, it was originally designed as a Hindu temple dedicated to the God Vishnu. With the temple itself, the grounds around it and the surrounding temples, they cover 1.6 million square meters of land. I don’t know too much about the history but the sheer scale is phenomenal. Compared to other places I’ve been on the globe I’m surprised it’s not classed in the top seven world wonders, it’s a beast!

One of the hardest parts is getting up at 4am to jump in your tuk tuk and head there for sunrise, it’s the done thing and is pretty special, maybe ensure you have coffee at the ready though. A tuk tuk is a great way to see many of temples in a day, you get the luxury of sitting back and being driven everywhere but don’t let that make you think it’s an easy day, it’s not, it’s so hot and you still do a lot of walking but it’s worth it and the whole place is stunning. You’ll actually need two to three days to see everything, we didn’t have the time. I hope the photos do it justice.

In the afternoon we found a local pool to chill before dinner and an early night, we had to say our good byes in the morning. I believe the adventures have only began and I can’t wait to see her gimpy little face again soon.

Siem Reap

Angkor Wat

Leaving Phnom Penh wasn’t the easiest trip I’ve ever taken as it was one set back after another. It all started with a ticketing error on a website which had to be chased down for a refund. That took ages to solve so all the seats were initially sold out, luckily I managed to get two but when we arrived at the bus station our van was broke and the only bus we could get was the local crapper for the same price.

After much eye rolling and having surrendered to our situation, we finally got to Otres beach, Sihanoukville at 2230 – 9 hours after we had left our hotel for a journey that’s advertised as 3 1/2!

This was a place we used as a pit stop; the gateway to get to the Koh Rong and Koh Rong Samloem Islands.The journey to those islands would take us on our first boat ride together.

Now in the last post I described Steph as having a little trouble with transport. This is something I may have forgotten about when I was collecting the tickets and, whilst turning around looking for her, she appears with a face like a slapped arse! I’m thinking; “Bloody hell! She’s being really hard work this morning and miserable as sin”. It wasn’t until we walked up the pier that it clicked!

I held her hand as we went, she was shaking like a shitting dog bless her (and there’s me thinking she’s a miserable cow!) I had to chuckle. I apologised and told her the thoughts I was having; what an arse hole! As soon as we were away she was fine and I think after the fourth or fifth boat ride we’d been on she now enjoys them… Almost.

Both islands were incredible. We had a beach front bell tent for Koh Rong and stayed at the Mad Monkey Party Hostel for Koh Rong Samloem. The hostel is out on its own remote bay so had a real castaway feel to it. I recommend both, but maybe only a few nights at the hostel as it really is a constant party; one which we definitely discovered on our boat trip.

The group we went with started drinking at 0900 for someone’s birthday, it certainly reminded me of my last trip in 2011 but I’m sure I wasn’t that loud back then, never! It was good fun though and involved a bay with the clearest waters I have ever been in named Clear Water Bay (they thought long and hard when naming that one). We went snorkelling but it was pretty unimpressive. The best activity of the day was the fishing!

This opinion has nothing to do with me catching two fish and Steph catching none. I know you all don’t care about fishing and it’s probably not worth mentioning, but it was the first fish I’ve ever caught in my life! Only taken 30 years to become a real man and when you see the size of the fish I am sure you’ll all agree it was a beast!

Other than the partying it was a blissful few days on beautiful islands chilling out and getting some sun. Sometimes it’s great to do nothing!

Otres Beach

Koh Rong

Koh Rong Samloem

She’s here! After five weeks of counting down and 36 hours worth of travelling, Stephanie finally arrived in Phnom Penh. For those of you that don’t know Steph very well, she’s afraid of flying, boats, any road vehicle that she’s not in control of, my old scooter, dogs and probably much more which I’m yet to discover. Least to say, SE Asia isn’t the place to avoid them so what better way to start off, than by picking her up on a rented Hello Kitty scooter! It was a pile of shit and I think I only got away with it as she was still smacked off her face on diazepam that the doctor had prescribed for flying. All jokes aside, as there’s far too many when she’s around, it was great to have her little face with me for the coming few weeks.

I had carried out all the planning stage on my own and pre booked all the accommodation, it’s a first for me doing it like that but with only a short trip ahead and Chinese New Year a few days away it was best that way. Our first stop was a beautiful roof top pooled hotel for our stay in the city. From there we would jump on Hello Kitty and explore.

It wasn’t really a mega busy few days, we enjoyed the pool, went to a few markets, ate some Khmer food, watched traditional Khmer dance show at the national museum (don’t bother wasting your money on that one) and visited the morally obligatory Tuolsleng Genocide Museum and Choeung Ek Genocidal Center or as they are commonly known, S21 and The Killing Fields, respectively.

I won’t go in to much detail about those visits, as you can imagine by the names, they’re powerful places for the wrong reasons. Places like this must be visited so we can all bear witness to the torture that humans can inflict on each other, to learn from the horrific past and never let it happen again and ultimately remember those that weren’t and aren’t as fortunate as we are today. Life can be a tyrant, full of hate and oppression but on the other side be full of love and kindness. I believe it’s the latter that we mostly see, it’s not really a bad place to knock about and humans are generally good but people get lost sometimes, it’s places like those museums that should remind us and keep us from straying so far from peace. Lets hope no one has to endure suffering like that ever again.

Phnom Penh

S21 and The Killing Fields

The Philippines was done, I’m back on my own and I was heading to some main land. I’ve been waiting to get to Cambodia since last visiting SE Asia in 2011. I arrived in Phnom Penh and decided to jump straight on a bus to Kampot. There I would spend five days before travelling back up to the city to meet Stephanie.

I had accommodation booked for one night at Nomads Backpackers, thought nothing of it but it ended up being a little bit strange. To start I got a “free upgrade” which was only a larger single room but next to where the owner stayed, no problem, but when the owner is a super camped up David Brent you start to worry, his laugh and jokes were just as awkwardly timed too. He was probably deep down very nice but he didn’t stop going on about what they did here, what they do for the community and how they know everything, it wasn’t hard to smell the bullshit! I booked another place to stay for the week and that was justified the next morning. I went out for breakfast in just a pair of shorts and Camp David came running up to me like a giggly school kid and went “Oooo you’ve got something stuck to you!” and then went ahead and pinched my nipples… hilarious on reflection, a little inappropriate at the time, the shocked faces at the breakfast table said it all! I headed for a legitimate chain hostel after that, mainly because he had the cheek to charge me for breakfast, the slag!

The first night I met a few people and went out to the early hours of the morning, even spotted Camp David out in the club, an awkward hello that. The morning after I headed to a free water park, it was good fun but boring after a while, especially as I was a thirty year old male playing alone whilst I waited for some friends to turn up. Now who’s the suspect weirdo? The next day or two weren’t the most interesting as I was in bed with the two bob bits. Luckily I escaped being sick but I definitely wasn’t able to eat or leave my bed, I was taken out for thirty six hours.

Kampot has so much to offer, I couldn’t recommend it highly enough. The days I did get out and about I managed to ride up Bokor mountain and see temples, churches and derelict buildings, went underground to a temple cave, had a wander round a pepper plantation and a coastal ride to the nearby town of Kep.

All of these were best reached by moped, you can rent one for $5 a day and it’s by far the best way to see it all. The rides are an adventure in themselves, there’s some beautiful sweeping mountain roads and some, almost, off road dirt tracks out into the sticks.

La Plantation, a pepper plantation outside of Kampot, was really worth the visit, they put on free 45 minute tours in English or French throughout the day and free tasting session once the tour has finished. The Kampot pepper is regarded by many as the best pepper on the planet. It was genuinely delicious and so was the Khmer Root Cafe which is a wooden shack down the road from the pepper plantations with all the chefs local to the area, one which I couldn’t resist a photo with. The dish was so good I indulged myself and had two, it was also my first Lok Lak, which is Kampot peppered beef served on onions and tomatoes, it’s definitely my favourite meal in Cambodia.

Overall I loved my time there and it’s a place you could easily spend a few weeks, it’s really relaxed and according to Camp David there’s 21 days worth of activities. The best part of it all was the food. Finally back to decent SE Asian grub, it’s sent my morale’s through the roof!

Heading back up to Phnom Penh now to meet Stumpy or Stephanie as she prefers to be called.

Dolphins Splash Waterpark

Bokor Hill Mountain

Phnom Chhngok Cave Temple

La Plantation

Khmer Root Cafe

Kep

This the last post from the Philippines. There’s not many wow stories to report as it’s all been beaches and beers.

Arriving in El Nido we instantly knew we were back on the travellers trail, it was busy but still had a good feel to it. Personally, I was over the moon as they had a small gym in town I could use, the proper spit and sawdust type. The main highlights from our time there was Lio Beach Resort and Pukka Bar, which was the customary reggae joint. That was the venue for a great night out, there was a few faces we’d been hanging out with, Annie was back in the fold and I believe we ended up with 7 of us that evening. The band were good, however when the band’s finished, it turns in to a night club, that was better! So I walked to the bar listening to UB40 and everyone chilling out but came back listening to electronic music and everyone fist pumping on the dance floor. I think I have finally found a business venture for any major western city.

Lio beach was simply stunning, you can grab a free shuttle bus from El Nido every half hour, it leaves from the school field in the centre of town. Being a resort it’s so well kept and a great atmosphere. The pier adds something that most Asian beaches don’t have, it also reminded me of home. Staying late for the sunset is a must here and I hope the pictures do it justice as it’s the best one I’ve seen since I left the UK!

After El Nido we headed to Napcan beach where we stayed at Where 2 Next hostel. This place was a little diamond in the rough compared to most of the Filipino accommodation. Hammocks and Wi-fi where the order of the first few days, we only left to have a dip in the sea and watch the sunsets. The last day was a little different as Filipino legend Manny Pacquiao was defending his world title and the local restaurant had it on! He’s probably the most well known man in the Philippines and it was wicked to share the fight with the locals, even if it was delayed so they could play 7 minutes worth of adverts between rounds. After a few beers and rums we ended up dancing the night away to reggaeton music at the nearby party hostel until the early hours of the morning.

Ryan and I headed out the next evening for a quite one as we were parting ways at the crack of dawn. I was off up to Coron and he back down to Port Barton. It’s been great fun and not once has it been hard work. He may say something different! I’m glad I got to share the experience with him. Annie and all the others I met along the way.

I would give you a bit of information on Coron, the place I headed to next, but unfortunately I was taught if you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all. One problem I did encounter was completely my fault, I booked my flight for February 24th instead of January and it cost me £55 to get it sorted but for the amount of flights I’ve taken and never had any problems it was probably long overdue, so I can’t complain at my own stupidity.

It’s Cambodia next and I’ve been waiting for this since 2011!

Salamat Pilipinas.

El Nido

Lio Beach

Nacpan Beach

Coron

Having travelled by ferry, two busses and tricycle for several hours we finally arrived in Moalboal at 2300. This was going to be our base for the next few days with canyoneering at Kawasan Falls our main adventure.

Having read several blogs and making contact with Mike Vincent African, who you can get on Facebook if you ever want to go canyoneering there yourself, I’m sure he’ll do you a good deal, we had a plan how to best see the falls. The idea was to head out early using public transport, see the falls before everyone else started arriving and then meet up with our guide and go canyoneering. Usually when travelling it never quite goes to plan but luckily that day did.

Catching the bus from Moalboal to Kawasan Falls is simple, it’s costs 30 pesos and takes about 20-30 minutes, you then have a short trek up to the falls. You’ll need to pay an entrance fee, this is 30 pesos too. Once in you’ll be greeted by the magnificent coloured stream coming down to your left hand side, the colour is due to the minerals in the water and makes for beautiful turquoise water flowing down lush dense green jungle. It’s quite a sight to be fair.

The falls are tiered with the first the main falls then two smaller upper falls with a short trek in between each other. Everything was wet and it was raining but the tracks are good and we were able to do it in flip flops but I’d advise some wet shoes if available.

As the photos show, all three are amazing. The water is just incredible and being able to get in amongst it all is great but the fun really hadn’t started until we went canyoneering.

It has gone down as one of the best days out I’ve ever had travelling, it was that good. Mike has sorted us out with Wilson our guide for the day and they also supplied all necessary safety equipment including life vest, helmet, wet shoes and even lunch at the end was supplied. We haggled and got a really good deal but you shouldn’t look to pay more than about 1200 pesos without food. It’s worth every peso though!

We researched to see if you actually required a guide or if you could go alone but having done it you definitely need a guide and there’s also check points to ensure you are with one as it’s now all government run.

It starts with a motorcycle ride for 15-20 minutes (all included) and then a trek for about 30 minutes. It’s all downhill from there!

Wilson’s opening question as we got off the motorbikes, with a cheeky grin, was “Would you like to go the extreme route or the normal route?” Which we both laughed and said normal of course… With the real answer being “Extreme” he then shouted “Of course you are warriors!” and then jogged off down the trek which we quickly worked out meant to follow at that pace! Even with Ryan struggling to keep up we managed to skip past many groups and crack on. I think Wilson was really on a promise but he never mentioned it.

The canyoneering involved a range of tasks from jumping, sliding, climbing, trekking and posing for photos, which Wilson was a great camera man for. It was honestly such good fun, having been lucky enough as a youngster and in the forces doing many similar activities I could really appreciate how good it was. I couldn’t recommend it highly enough to anyone that enjoys outdoor adventures. A few highlights were the 15m jump and the rope swing which you can hopefully see in the videos below.

I must admit one thing, even though I’ve done this before, I have never been greeted by little ladies knocking out bbq food half way down! The sausage covered in ketchup was delicious but we bottled it and decided not try the chicken intestines!

A big highlight for the geeks but not so much the naturists was the mini hydro-electric plant that harnesses the energy from the Kawasan river. I can’t say it interested me that much but for you that are intrigued it kicks out 0.72KW and was built in 1990.

I’ve probably banged on enough about how good this day was but there’s not many times I’ve come away from a day like that with such a grin on my boat race. If you ever get the chance, jump at it!

This post starts with a warning… Cebu Pacific are a terrible airline. It’s far easier for me to list the things they got right than wrong, so here’s the list; F**k all! Excuse my language but I’m sure that gives you the idea. Sorry Mum

What a difference there is from Manila to Sydney. I went from a fairly unpopulated, clean and spacious city to the dirty, very different smelling and crowded Philippino capital. It’s not a place I’d like to stay too long and luckily we were on our way after one night. I would only ever see it as a stepping stone but one day I may try exploring it, Bangkok was far better the second time round. The best bit was meeting my mate Ryan, a strong embrace and a realisation that we’re off travelling together for a month… what was I thinking! I’m kidding, it’s going to be a pleasure to spend some time with the Bradley Cooper looking, long haired hippie. He hasn’t revelled in that comparison at all.

We headed down to Alona Beach on Panglao Island. We managed to fly straight in and it was really easy. Air Asia nails it every time! We grabbed a tricycle taxi at the airport, don’t get the taxi’s as they’re expensive and you’ll save yourself 300 pesos by taking the trikes. We chucked our bags down at Lennons Place backpackers and then checked out the town. The backpackers is decent, it’s very genuine with bunkbeds in small shack style huts. The area itself is great, the beach is lovely, plenty of food options (although a little bit pricey and no real signature dishes), there’s lots of activities to get stuck in to and many bars to grab a beer in! It’s a place that could easily suck you in for a few weeks, if it was priced lower.

We didn’t get up to much the first few days, it was mainly boozing and lying on the beach and a cliff jump. We were awaiting the smiley face of my friend Anouska, or Annie to her mates. It’s so good to be sharing her first Asia experience, that little face can be such a picture. Along with her turning up and Ryan’s friend Kev (Alan from the Hangover) already being there, we ended up with a great little quartet for New Year.

It will probably go down as the best New Year I’ve ever had, it was a belter! That’s Ryan’s Geordie slang for amazing.

Firstly we grabbed some scooters, don’t look to pay more than 400 pesos for 24hrs rental, then headed off on our journey to the Chocolate Hills. It was a decent ride out to them and along the way we stopped at a local town for a quick bite to eat. On reflection we all think we should have eaten before we decided to check out the local market. We saw all sorts, from a type of grey fish gruel to a severed cows head with flies round it and the smells… wow! It was certainly a proper Asian market experience. The worst bit was a poor pig screaming because it was strapped to a moped! It sounds funny but the noise was harrowing. Oh well, bacon for lunch I guess.

Next up was the Chocolate Hills. They are a mad natural wonder that used to be underwater and were created by the land rising, coral deposits and the erosion of limestone from rain water. They’re a great attraction and well worth a trip up to see them. It reminded us all of the Teletubbies gaff but they’re over the hill now anyway. After, we headed to see the Tarsiers (the smallest primates on the planet) and along from that, the man made forrest.

We were then ready for the big night! It was certainly that because drinking the local tequila until 0630 wasn’t by any chance a small affair. Alona beach didn’t disappoint us, it was one hell of a party and great atmosphere. Time flew really quickly and before we knew where we were, it was 0630. Such a good group of people and great bars to drink in. We left when the party was still going… We must be getting old! Annie did well with choosing this destination, we couldn’t have had a better night.

With sore heads, the next day we went to a beach called Dumaluan. It’s only a short tricycle ride from Alona beach and will set you back about 150 pesos one way. It’s well worth it as the 8-9km’s of long white sand is very quite and peaceful. It’s worth the trip out. As you can imagine our night was short and we were all in bed by 2200, ready for the next days adventure.

During in the week leading up to New Years we had planned a boat trip around some of the local islands. It was just the four of us and involved island hoping and snorkelling. Both of which were incredible! The snorkelling was amazing, the reef was huge and you couldn’t move for seeing fish and several turtles were spotted with ease. The colours were so vibrant and intense, it’s a shame none of us had an underwater camera to share the experience but so you better understand, we did see Nemo and Dory. The last stop was a short stay on The Virgin Island off Bohol. This is where we formed a boy band and as you can see by the last photo, we’re manufactured beauties! The island is a short sand spit which has only a few trees. The locals go there and set up food stalls for the tourists to try different things on the tour route. I tried my first sea urchin, it’s not going to win any culinary competitions but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be after he spooned the gloopy, fishy paste like substances into my hand, I think he rescued it with the lime juice! It was a great day out and ended superbly when on the final step to shore, after being so successful transferring all day, Annie fell in the sea with all her clothes and backpack on. It was slightly hilarious!

Rather a long post but it’s been non-stop as you can imagine. We’re catching a ferry to Cebu tomorrow and we’ll see what happens from there.

Alona Beach

New Years Eve

New Years Day and The Boat Trip

It’s been a busy five days. Hope everyone’s had a great Christmas and enjoyed Boxing Day. I have been keeping a secret about heading down to Sydney to see my brother Adam, Fay and the Sharpe family. Adam has always enjoyed surprising others so I thought it was time he got a slice of his own medicine. No tears but we did get a few F’s! It worked out great and I loved having Christmas there. Thanks so much to both Adam and Fay for looking after me and the effort they put in to knock up a banging Christmas dinner for everyone. Sorry Mum, it was the best Turkey I’ve ever had on Christmas Day, you must have taught him well!

We did the Aussie thing and soaked up the sun on the beach that day, played golf on Boxing Day and kicked a football round with the kids. It’s been such good fun and even napping watching films on the sofa has been a delight. You don’t get many options like that away from home. I would tell you about Cards Against Humanity in the evening but I’m trying to keep this blog as clean as possible.

As far as travelling blogs go, this one isn’t about an adventure, where to stay or how much things cost. It’s to say a thank you to the family and friends for a wonderful few days. Great to see the lads out in the pub, see the Sharpe boys faces as they realised they had new Nike trainers from Santa and have a right giggle over red wine in the evenings with all the rest.

I’m off to the Philippines to meet some of my best mates now.

Have a great New Years everyone!

Sydney Christmas